My life be like ooo aaaa

Today is going to be nice. For the first time since I've been back my parents are going to Olympia for my Dad's business trip and won't be back until Thursday night. I'm planning to have a friend over this evening that I haven't seen since... Christmas break I think?

It's 10:38 am and I need a shower. My Dad is going to keep me busy today with some projects like watering the plants and painting some benches. That'll be nice, I like having the chance to listen to some music, exercise and get tanner. I'd like to give myself a manicure at some point today after I play in the dirt, I hate when my nailpolish is half chipped off.

Yesterday was fun. I got paid and made about $170 from only 3 days of working, that's pretty damn good, especially considering how easy and enjoyable my job was. My Dad went out to his cousin's house yesterday and apparently this dipshit didn't make proper records of his worm spraying so the USDA marked the fruit "tainted" and unfit for regular grocery store produce sections. He's got an entire orchard of perfect cherries that he would make no profit hiring people to pick. He'll probably go out of business because of his own laziness.

He, my Dad and a few other people were apparently out there yesterday picking everything they could to be sold to different warehouses that decontaminate the cherries for canning and frozen desserts. They're only going to sell for $3 a bin or something ridiculously low like that and he'll be lucky to break even. What a dumbass.

I started drawing my first family portrait yesterday and it looks really good. I know the person I'm drawing it for has wanted one of him for a long time so this will be even better.

peace.

Christmas I can't complain.

I can honestly tell you today was the best Christmas I've ever had.

Though this isn't meant to somehow demean the work of my parents or Dad's side of the family in past years. I've been fortunate enough to have a lot of great Christmas's; today was just really good. The weather was beautiful today, like 77 degrees, might even have gotten in the 80's at some point because my Grandma was complaining about being hot but she always does that. She'd much rather be cold most of the time.

#1 Gift of the Day: King of the Hill DVDs, Hell f**king yes I am so happy to finally have these.

You know what's awesome about having the DVD version? I get access to the SPANISH version and can watch it with English translations!! So I can enjoy watching King of the Hill and study spanish at the same time while I practice chords......!!!!!!! YESSSSSSS *EXPLODES*

I got some of the best damn gifts this year. It seemed as though I got a disproportionately larger number of gifts than Avery but I realized it was because my sister got a big gift this year-- brand new laptop! She's needed one for years so I'm happy she's got one for school. I know she'll take better care of it than I ever have any of my laptops. Right now I'm using my Mom's laptop because my Grandma's PC doesn't play DVDs. Oh well it's a little old but it's been playing my Intervention episodes just fine since I've gotten here... I just can't get enough of those meth heads and alcoholics and PCP addicts I tell you what. Yet I can't sit through an episode of popular shows like It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia without being forced.

Awesome Gift of the Day #2: My sketch set from my Dad!

Well this was something I found for $25 at Ross but didn't want to spend my own money on it so I had my Dad get it for me. He didn't bother to wrap it, it was given to me in the Ross bag he got it in sort of crumpled up but I didn't care, I acted like it was the first time I saw it and everyone was impressed by my Dad's gift buying skills.

I spent a solid three hours sitting with my aunt Dale and drawing this picture of my cousin today. It was nice, working on the picture sort of glued me to my seat and she's always surprisingly easy to make conversation with. She was so grateful to be with us. Since my uncle Robert died she was never able to spend Christmas was my Grandpa Dennis's (his brother's) family. My grandparents supported Robert and Dale for years to help with living expenses along with the SSI they were already receiving from the state from disability. They're both really Jewish and Robert had some screws lose which is why they never worked. He passed away recently so Dale finally got to spend Christmas with her family. It honestly makes me a little sad to think about the past when I hear my Grandma and Dale talk about the stress their husbands put them through and how relieved they are in some sense. 

I don't know, I think women just had to put up with more back then in general.... 

Tomorrow I'm going to Dale's house to check out her epic collection of stuff. She's a collector and she says she has THOUSANDS of stickers, which makes me happy because as you guys know I'm a sticker fanatic ever since I started putting them on my bike. I bet I'll find some hilarious retro ones. I've seen the inside of her house before, for some a "hoarder" house is really uncomfortable to spend time in but it doesn't bother me at all for some reason. I'm just too fascinated to care, I'm like my Dad that way. Tomorrow he's going to go with me and we're going to fix her sink.

Christmas dinner was really good tonight. The ingredients used were really good and fresh because they're mainly organic and I didn't feel gross after eating. I didn't eat that much though. Didn't feel like eating sweets today at all and didn't have the cinnamon rolls for breakfast or pie after dessert. I've decided that since I'm here I might as well get in better shape while I've got this nice space and healthy food around and it's sort of deterred me from eating more.

I feel like alcohol makes me not want sweets for some reason, too. Like if I'm drinking I tend to only eat savory things and eating something like a donut, pie, icecream etc doesn't sound appetizing what so ever. Ha ha my aunt and uncle got me a bottle of my uncles favorite tequila, he's Mexican and likes to party, I'm sure he knows a good bottle of tequila and I look forward to trying this eventually. After the trip though, it's stowed in my "stuff that I don't actually need until the end of the trip" suitcase. 

Alright I think that's enough for now. 

peace. 

A good guitarist just knows.

Today I decorated this "Gingerbread Dance Club" with my cousin Aiden. 

I love him so much and was super happy to see him. He's 6 now so we can carry on little conversations and he cracks me up because he's clever. 

It's Monday and tomorrow's Christmas eve. I don't really get all fired up over counting down the the days or anything, but now that it's almost here I'm getting excited. I finally finished my shopping today.

This morning I got up around 10:30 am. My Grandma and parents have always gotten up earlier and this morning I overheard my Dad talking to my Grandma about the guitar and how I'm starting to "create my own style with it." He also of course mentioned his awesome guitar-playing, pot smoking cousin Carl that once told my Dad that the key to getting good at guitar is Practice, practice, practice all the time. Lol thank you Dad for sharing this insight. Anyway that complement meant a lot to me... For some reason I'm always much more flattered when I overhear a person talking about me than a complement to my face that my playing is good.

Whenever someone says I'm good I just tend to deny it. Even after all this work I feel like I'm not close to where I want to be. I am so critical of my playing cleanliness, making mistakes, and the fact that I have such a difficult time memorizing things. I don't know any guitarists that have to grab a big binder of tabs to play for their f**king family, a good guitarist just knows. They know how to both improvise AND play songs. They can confidently perform pieces without forgetting sections and having to figure out where that damn measure is located so I can keep playing...

That perfection is what drives me to practice the way that I do. That confidence just isn't there yet... Even playing in front of my family in the living room that I haven't seen in a year in a half I found practically impossible. I was frustrated because I didn't have my nylon string acoustic and had to borrow my Grandma's steal string. I didn't have the Nothing Else Matters tab nor do I have Guitar Pro on this computer so I had to print it in ugly rough tab form from the ultimate-guitar website. The tab that I printed was laid out very confusing so I couldn't find the solo.

Yet everyone said it was good and I'm just screaming to myself in my head, "No! It's not!! I'm so much better than this, I just wish I had my acoustic.. I just wish I had the tab." And it's always been that way. I can sit here and play alone for hours upon hours and move from song to song seemingly effortlessly yet when I get in front of family or people like Jake that are way better than me I just become a disorganized, excuse making mess.

I'm so tired of that... I need to get my shit together and put more effort into memorizing songs and not skipping from song to song. I need to stick with just three songs at a time and make routine progress on them until I complete and memorize them before I stow them away and print new shit. I did sooo much of that my first year and a half of playing (note that I've been playing 1 year, 7 months... Jake only recently really cracked down on me for being ADHD with songs) and it's what's lead me to where I am now and I know the changes I have to make to get there now.

Wow, I was supposed to be writing about having a good day but now here I am crying.

I guess just being able to show my family what I can do after all this work is important to me. Somehow not having copies of two of my recital pieces was a complete b*tch and even if my family was impressed I still felt like sh*t about it. Oh well, guess there's always next year.


Okay let's talk about something other than guitar...

When I say playing for my family I mean my Mom, Grandma, Mandy, Zoe, Zoe's boyfriend, my sister, Adam, Aiden, Adam's neice and my Dad. My Dad and I had just gone Christmas shopping at Ross so I got a change to grab some last minute stuff that makes my amount of money right now a little less obvious. My Dad's been kicking me a lot of cash on this trip because he says he feels "bad for me" because my sister's loaded from working at Roasters. Well that's what I get for going to school full time I guess.

Next quarter I still will be. I'll just be taking that online class and having one class a day so I have zerooooo excuse NOT to get a job. I'd go stir crazy if I didn't. Terry and I are both convinced we are going to do a lot better this quarter than last, but that means I have to stay on top of things better than I did last quarter. Working might help me schedule my day better, who knows.


peace.

Memory foam will improve my quality of life

So it was Christmas today!

I'm feeling fine, just locked the doors up, did one workout... not really feeling like doing another one. Holiday food has taken a tole on me. I know it sounds lame because it's Christmas but I've gotten sort of out of shape since I've gotten home so I wanted to make sure to do a couple workouts tonight. Today I played a little over an hour.

Christmas festivities were good! Woke up early this morning to take a shower and get my makeup on because I had plans to deliver some of the baked goods my sister made to my Grandma's house. I went over there at around 11:30 after we were finished unwrapping presents.

I got a lot of awesome stuff for Christmas this year. I made a pretty specific list and my parents really did buy everything I wanted.

My Dad got me a guitar calendar, some deodorant, razors, and a Rite Aid gift card for $50 which will come in handy. Better Rite Aid than Fred Meyer, the couple options my Dad had for gift card shopping. Gift cards are such a nice gesture because it sort of allows some impulse spending. If someone gives the reasonable person cash they won't blow it all on junk they don't necessarily need.

My Mom got me shampoo, conditioner, a Mac slant brush (wow!), a new Mac eyeliner (I still have a lot left of my other eyeliner so I'm good for awhile in case it takes me awhile to find a job in the summer or something), paid for next month's guitar lessons, an excellent straightening iron that I really needed, a Mac foundation which I'm going to exchange, and a memory foam mattress pad.

Wow, Christmas makes me feel pretty luxurious, haha. I'm very excited to have all these nice things, but I try to stay humble at the same time. I need to remember that I'm extremely blessed to be given all of these nice things and to be grateful to my family for the tenacious amount of money they're spending on our education and now Christmas. They really do hold it together well considering how my Dad has always behaved about spending. He's probably just accepted there's no way around it.

Brendan got me those striped socks in the right corner. I've been wearing them all day, including when I went out to my Grandma's house and sat and talked for awhile. Traci was there with Wyatt, who already has a Wilson stocking. My Grandma gets on those things, haha. Traci is doing well, she's got her own apartment now so she'll be living there with Wyatt. Anthony lives with my Grandma and I'm pretty sure his bedroom is that whole left upstairs so I wouldn't see why he'd want to leave. I'm sure he's got tons of video games up there. Grandma has told me about how much he plays X-Box.

The way I see it there's a lot worse things a 14 year old guy could be doing than video games... I figure if Anthony's playing video games he's not causing any issues for Grandma. My Grandma is getting lap band surgery in about a month. It's a relatively safe surgery but I'm still worried about her health going into it. Her hair is looking good, she actually looked pretty healthy today and I'm hoping the lap band surgery will help her lose the weight she needs to lose to maintain a healthier lifestyle. It's different to think she's in her 70's now. She seems the same to me as she always has.

Grandma gave my sister and I $50 each so that'll be some nice extra money to put in the bank too. So this has been a pretty excellent Christmas to go with a nice couple weeks off. I have one week left of staying home. I'm getting to the point where I'm a little more ready to go back. I'm sure by New years Day I'll be packing things up ready to go... or hung over at Katelynn's. Both.

Aww, Miranda looks so sweet on my bed right now. She's been awake almost all day, running around and being mischievous. She had a good Christmas too.

peace. 

Happy Chrimbus Eve!

I hope everyone is of course having an excellent Christmas eve, it is 12:44 PM. Mom's planning on making ham for dinner tonight, we have a pretty massive amount of gifts under the tree, I have all day to practice... All is right in my world.

I even have my sister's chair today because she's going to be with Jimmy over in... I can't remember. Some town far away hanging out with his family. I woke up in a nasty mood again and started yelling about stupid things. I can't even remember what it was I was yelling about, I've honestly been a snit in the morning lately. Oh, I was trying to pack up most of my computer software and my POD. That's kind of a delicate job. Honestly I shouldn't have brought any of that stuff here, haven't used it! 

Mizu last night was interesting. The weather was extremely bad driving to Pasco. Lots and lots of hard rain, which luckily didn't freeze but it felt as though it was on the verge to. I picked up Hannah at about 5:45, right on time. We talked all about the current affairs in Korea. Hannah knows all about how Chinese are using North Korea as a tourist destination. She was shocked at how interested I was in East Asian politics, and she had just taken a class in it the previous quarter so we had plenty to talk about.

I mean we talked about college and stuff too. She's going to a school in... I want to say Massachusetts, where it's extremely cold and snowy all the time. She was actually optimistic about it because she said it snows a lot in Seoul too and it's just as cold. Washington is significantly warmer, thank God. I really like the weather here. Maybe everyone likes the weather from where they come from. 

I kind of miss playing the Sims. Technically I could set up my computer again to play it but I need to get some practice done so that's priority number 1. My goal is to get 120 minutes in today, between the scales and my temporary renewed Songster membership it shouldn't be too hard. 

Last year I went to the Johanson Christmas eve party and saw a ton of people that I hadn't seen in a year. I didn't get invited this year, maybe they're just keeping it more of a family thing. Last year it was really fun, though. We took a ton of pictures that night... I remember looking a lot pastier and feeling more insecure back then. 

I feel like my looks and my self esteem have significantly improved since last December, 2012 has been good to me. There's a picture from that night. I'm wearing the gray tanktop in the corner. Most of the pictures I ended up in were candid and I looked horrible, haha. 

Late December was just about when I started picking up the guitar again. It's about my 1 year anniversary with the guitar. Had it not been for Brendan January would be my 2 year anniversary of not being with anyone, but I honestly don't consider myself "single" right now even if my facebook says otherwise. Me and Brendan are pretty close... like it's gotten passed the point where I would feel right spending time alone with another guy that I might have potential interest in without feeling like I'm doing something wrong.

I feel like actual interest in someone should feel that way. Brendan is an incredibly intelligent human being, he's mature and sets high standards in his quality of life like I do. We can talk for hours, he listens to what I say. He's tall, pretty good looking. I think this has pretty good potential... I can't ever say anything in the long run because you just never know how life changes but for now I look forward to spending time with him. 

peace. 

Feeling some joy this holiday season.

I really am enjoying this month.

Being home has really started to feel like what it did when I lived here, though knowing I'm not stuck here makes it even nicer. This week has honestly been great, I've done so much and seen so many of the people I really should care about seeing. I don't know why I was so initially determined to spend time with people that I haven't spent time with before. I mean, I feel like certain people come into our lives for a reason, and going out of your way to search for new people in an area that you hardly inhabit anymore sounds pointless. Though I am open to spending time with new people, I've decided to let that happen if someone I haven't seen in awhile tries to get ahold of me first here in the next couple weeks. In which case, yeah, I'd totally be down to hang out with and catch up with anyone...

I guess what I'm saying is that one month is not enough time to do some of the things I'd initially planned but there are still other things that I do hope still happen... depending on how the roads are of course. There's also been NEW plans setting in motion for the next couple weeks so that's exciting too!

I still plan to..
-Go out with Samantha, either on Tuesday or Wednesday, 18th or 19th. I'm planning on saving this $40 in my wallet for said time. My car is full on gas, too, which is nice.

-See Brad on that same day that I go out to see Sam. They live in the same town so I'll be able to swing by before or after I see Samantha, hopefully.

Other things that have come up:

-Brendan is coming here sometime next week, probably the 21st or the 22nd. He's waiting to know what's happening with some jury duty before he knows if he can so I'm crossing my fingers, honestly.

-"Japanese club" (oh, the good old days) party at Taylor's house on the 23rd. These parties are always fun, and it'll be extremely interesting to see what everyone's been up too for the last year.

So yeah today was good! My mom gave me some money for doing the computer organizing and I did some Christmas shopping with my amazing bff Michael Z. I say BFF because he's another one of my very close friends. It's funny even if I don't mention him very often I do consider him one of my best friends because he's the first friend I made in college. Literally I met him in FYI at CBC. The first thing I asked him was, "Are we supposed to put our last names on these name tags?" and he's like "I don't know but I totally did on accident!" It's so funny for us to look back on that for some reason. He's a senior at UW right now studying biology, I'm very proud of him to be taking these rigorous courses but what else would you expect.. he's Chinese, ha ha.

Michael actually helped me pick this out. Check out this BEAUTIFUL gift set that I'm going to get my sister for Christmas. I mean this is primo Bath and Body Works. It's so hard to pick a decent smell because there's so many to choose from. I kept on picking up samples but nothing stood out to me as being the best. When I saw the gift boxes I knew immediately that's what I wanted to buy. They're really nice, my sister loves shower gel and B&B products. 

I always post what I get my family on my blog the day I buy it because I know I can never remember after I wrap it or even on Christmas day. It gets mixed into the pile of stuff. My sister doesn't read my blog, I know that... And to any of you mystery readers out there, don't be snitches! ha ha. I trust you. 

I also got a jacket for my Mom at Old Navy, one that looks remarkably similar to the many jackets I've borrowed from her and LOST because I know for a fact I don't return things very well. It's like, my sister gets mad when I use her shower gel so I buy her this... My mom gets mad when I lose her stuff so I buy her this to make up for it! It honestly hasn't happened in quite awhile, though... mainly because I don't live at home anymore, haha.

We have so much stuff in this house it'd be hard to tell if some things went missing. Most of the leftover junk in my room I could care less about, but feel some weird sense of nostalgic relief that it's still here. It's just stuff that makes me feel more at home.

I should probably call Brendan. It's almost midnight. We told eachother we liked eachother a lot yesterday. This is definitely a step in the right direction. I'm so surprised how much we have in common. We seem to have so many of the same philosophical views on things... yet at the same time we're different in things we do and music we listen too, but that's good I'm glad we're not completely the same! He likes sort of folky, acoustic music which hasn't even appealed to me for some reason. He's open and has an appreciation for many kinds of music, which is what's important to me.

He's so cool. We've been talking pretty much non-stop for the last week in some sense. Like I'm pretty sure we've talked on the phone every night this week except for a couple nights when I was tired. He's never the one to initiate getting off the phone. That's always me and it's because I'm normally tired. He's really good at texting but appreciates the fact that it takes me awhile to reply. Things are just going well with him and because there's not any emotional dramatic incidents I haven't had this need to come on here and go on and on about him. I do have a good feeling about something working out from this though.

peace. 

Learning the art of brownies.

I have not posted in a very long time...

For me anyway. Maybe it's because lately I've been really happy and busy and haven't felt a need to post every day. Not saying that I only write when I'm feeling tension but I guess I don't really feel a "need" to write. It's always healthy to write your thoughts down so here we go.

Right now I'm on my Dad's lame ass computer that freezes up when I try to add pictures. I have no idea what's wrong with this thing but I've been using it since I got home because my desktop computer can't hookup to the internet without this little port that I left in Ellensburg. So bringing my whole computer home was a very big waste of effort but how was I supposed to know that.

Katelynn got a new apartment! I visited Katelynn at the old apartment the second day I was back and we drank beer and watched movies. I drank a beer called "Sapporo" that was pretty light and delicious. Didn't get hungover, either. Sometimes drinking a little is nice, I've also drank a couple glasses of wine this week. One before bed the other night and another when I figured out my grades.

I did pretty well this quarter! I mean it wasn't fantastic because I got straight B's but as long as I'm in the 3-point range I can't complain. I got a 3.0 in accounting, 3.0 in pre-calc, and a 3.3 in my Legal class. I was really pumped that I pulled a B in probably the highest level math class I will ever have to take again. I considered it my "last math class" even if I'm still having to take Finite math next quarter. From what people have told me, it's mainly algebra so easier than pre-calc. Might as well get it over with this winter.

Next quarter I'm taking finite math, economics and english 102. I'm really hoping that my English skills will bring me an A, and having this last quarter of pre-calc will get me an A in Finite so I'll be able to raise my GPA from an overall 3.1 like I currently have. I'm still thinking about my grades because I'm already considering future plans after Central. I like to have at least a general idea of what I'd like to be doing in a couple years and have always been this way.

Now that I'm studying at a university I could look at this as my final academic frontier but I don't. My goal now is to work a couple years in the field, find a company that will pay for my schooling, and do my Masters degree before I settle down. Someday I do want kids and a family but I'd like to be completely accomplished with my academics before I take that step. My Mom says I should wait until I'm done with Central and see how I feel. I told her I can't imagine myself being completely satisfied with my college experience after this. I feel like this is just another bridge.

I told you guys my plan for this quarter was to catch up with some people I don't normally see and I feel like I've already partially accomplished that goal! I hung out with Taylor H. a couple evenings ago. She's doing very well, she's one of the head honchos of Amazon customer service reps (...like, she doesn't get laid off seasonally, and people go to her for questions) and she's living with her boyfriend who also works at Amazon in a really nice apartment. She's still baking a lot, as you can see she's making brownies in this picture. She taught me how to make chocolate chip brownies without destroying the chips-- "Add the chips last!" 

I love learning from people, especially about things that I don't normally do. That way in the future if say I wanted to make some double chocolate brownies.... well now I know!! lol. 

So yeah, just hanging out with Katelynn, practicing quite a bit of guitar, watching netflix, hanging out with family, talking to Brendan (a LOT)... It's been a pretty fulfilling break as well because I haven't JUST been doing what I want to do. Like I've also been helping my mom clean and went to her office a couple days ago to organize her computer files. It's been like a very convenient mini job for me. I will get a couple more hours in today and earn a few bucks for Christmas shopping.

It's the 13th and I've done NO Christmas shopping because as you guys know my parents are supporting me and it'd pretty much be there money that I'm spending. I don't even want to check how much money is in my account right now because $2,500 loan money got transferred in there for some reason and it should be coming out for my next school payment so I don't want to see how much money is in there and feel depressed of how much money I really have.

So yeah, no Christmas shopping for me this year. My Mom already has my Christmas list. This is what I want this year:

1. Mac Studio Fix pressed powder

2. Mac Mascara

3. Mac black eyeliner

4. Mac slanted liner brush 

(Those all together will be about $80, it's the bulk of what I want for Christmas and what's most important to me because it's stuff I would inevitably have to buy anyway. Mac just works better than everything else and it's healthier on your skin...)

5. Ashtray

6. Music stand similar to the ones they use in the middle school. Literally I want a cast iron music stand, not those crappy fold up ones that are prone to tip over.

7. Pay for January's guitar lessons. ($80)

Again, I feel like such a mooch for having my parents pay for those lessons. It feels awful to me every time I think about it but I'd feel much guiltier if I lived an exciting life in Ellensburg. My parents are saving a ton of money by me going to school there instead of Western, UW, etc.. I would like to go to UW for my Masters degree someday, but my Mom said that's a Hell of a lot more expensive than regular university classes and I probably would not want to be doing that there. 

Okay it's almost 11:00. I should really get off and eat a leftover enchilada before I get into some practicing. I'm going to go to Mom's office again at 12:30 or so to work for a couple hours, then I'll come home and practice again, then I've got my lesson at 5:30!! 

peace. 

Merry Christmasssssssssssssshita

Gooooodmorning!

It of course is Christmas today, and we just got done unwrapping gifts and all of my lovely haul is sitting out on the coffee table. I got some great stuff. before I forget, here's what I got and who bought me what:

1. Bottle of Differin from Mom and Dad. Costs about $65, glad I didn't have to buy it.
2. Webcam from Mom and Dad
3. Fitness tube and fitness band from Mom and Dad
4. Bottle of MAC Studio Sculpt foundation from Mom
5. Colorsilk hairdye from Mom
6. SYSTEM OF A DOWN POSTER!!! from Avery
7. Long socks from Mom and Dad
8. Eyeliner and mascara from Mom and dad
9. Wool hat from Mom
10. Candles, a bath set, and a big chocolate pop from my secret santa at rite aid
11. A bento box from Avery
12. A green purse from Mom
13. A big insence set from Avery
14. A really nice razor from Mom and Dad
15. A metallica bass tabs book from Robert, along with fortune cookies (I loved this)
16. CUSTOM artwork by Samantha, I love this too!
17. A really neat t-shirt from Katharine, along with a hilarious book called Go the Fuck to Sleep.
18. And of course the beautiful pink pipe from Katelynn
19. $50 gift card to Target from Grandma.

Overall, great stuff. I love all of it. The only return I intend to do is the purse that my mom got me. I can't tell if I like it yet. Well, it's nicer than my current purse. I ended up giving the glamourpuss wallet that it came with to my sister though. It's zebra print with sparkles, eww. I do need a new wallet though.

I really don't like that my Grandma got us gifts when she told us she wasn't buying us anything. I would of bought her something as well. She got my Dad a $150 card when my mom only got a $50, hahahaha.

Robert wrote me a letter in Japanese with my gift, I freakin love it. It makes no sense and that's why it's awesome. He copied it from Google Translate. Katharine and Robert both outdid me this year, big time. I'm stoked that Katharine likes her lipstick though.

Samantha's gift didn't end up working out... apparently the scanner doesn't work. This still sort of makes me depressed and I hope we can figure it out later. Her custom artwork is painted and it looks so much like me. Samantha got a new phone!

I'm super excited for tonight. I get to see Brier who came to visit his family for christmas. He texted me last night when I was at Rhiannon's house. It was SO LOUD in the background that he just told me to call him today. He's cute, I'm stoked and hope he doesn't flake out or something lame.

I'm not disappointed that Christmas morning is over. I used to get all sad about it when I was a kid. This year the spirit of Christmas was sort of dead to me, but this morning I was uber happy to get all this great stuff. I'm gonna get my hair dyed today and i'll make my first webcam video with the new camera. : )

Merry Christmas everbodyyyy

yours,
Emily

How many paychecks before Christmas?

Goodafternoon, it's 2:26 pm and I have work at 5'. I should probably use this time to be productive but instead I'm wasting time on the computer. I'm gonna get off here when I'm done with this entry and do these damn Japanese assignments, I swear.

Too much on my mind, too much wondering. I am trying to relax and just let time go by as it should...

I'm pretty convinced that this guy that I like doesn't have any interest in talking to me because I haven't really heard from him in three days. That to me is a sign that yeah, get over it. Again. I'm not too concerned, just a little disappointed... or something. It's weird, I don't really have any emotions. I felt happy when we hung out together the other night and everything seemed cool, but when I left felt like we'd probably never talk again. My intuition usually tells me this, and it's never been wrong. Maybe I'm psychic, haha. But yeah, no we'll never talk again unless he makes the initiative because i've promissed myself that I never make any attempt to talk to someone that I like unless they talk to me first. It's pretty shitty though, it's officially been a year since I've been in any sort of relationship, and everyone that I've *been* with in the last year has been a complete mistake and hasn't given a rats ass about me at all.

Japanese was good today, a little stressful though. I had a quiz that I showed up to school at about 8:00 am to study for. I ended up memorizing all of the vocab words even if I procrastinated until the last minute. I'm pretty sure I'll get 100% on it, even if I spelt a couple things wrong. I wrote the kanji for two of the words which should make up for it. Sensee makes it pretty easy to get 100% if you study hard enough. The new grammer though, again is really frustrating.

I've got work tonight from 5-10:15 and then TOMORROW I GET PAID! WOO! i'm happy about this paycheck becauuuuse I obviously need more money for gas, and I intend on splurging on the first christmas present. Since I'm buying for only a few people, I figure I'll buy one or two gifts with each paycheck and then by Christmas I'll have shopped for everyone. I'm gonna buy a pipe for Katelynn, which will probably cost around $40. You know what would be totally amazing? If I could get a pipe custom done with the Coheed and Cambria symbol. I know that'd be a stretch, but if I could get it, that'd be the best gift ever. I'm sure I'll be able to find a good pipe otherwise though. I want something that I know Katelynn will like, but sort of has an "Emily feel" (lol) to it too. Like if I got a psychadelic rainbow pipe or something.

I'm also planning on getting Samantha a drawing tablet that will probably cost around $50. This is something that Samantha really needs for her art. Because I'm moving here in the spring, I don't know how much i'm going to be able to see my friends that live here in the tri cities. That being said, I'm planning on getting my few close friends very nice gifts because they've helped keep me sane for so long and I don't know what I would of done without them.

As for Katharine, I still have no idea at all what I'm going to get her. Shopping for Katharine is always really hard because she spends a lot of time doing things that don't require much.. like, running and working out and working on projects that she's already got the software for. She isn't that huge into makeup, and I don't really know what kind of books she likes to read-- plus that'd be sort of a lame gift anyway, a book... unless it was some cool illustrated book. Idk, I'm holding off Katharine's for a month or so.

My mom is still thinking about what she wants, and my sister has everything. I'm pretty sure I'm just gonna get my sister an eyeshadow pallette from Macy's so she can stop jacking my shadow. Or maybe an eyeshadow from Mac? The wet or dry kind? I know that she'll like that. I could get her a blue one and a white one. Those shadows cost about $15 each. This is why I'm spreading out my shopping, so I don't get hit with everything at the same time.

Depending on how much I get paid and what my finances look like tomorrow, I'm probably going to get my sister's and Katelynn's gift out of the way for this next couple weeks. I also gotta think of one for Shavonne too. turns out Grandma doesn't want us to send her anything.

Well, I better get going and get some work done. Two hours before work.

peace.