Tuesday, June 18, 2013

This week has been my real vacation

I hate being broke.

This morning I called Rite aid and apparently my drug tests haven't come in yet. Fabulous. I wasn't able to get ahold of Amy at Jcpennies either but I did leave a voicemail message that sounded pretty good. I want to start working so bad because I've been kind of stuck at home. My days have consisted of a lot of sims and practicing guitar lately.

A couple evenings ago I got invited to go to a party at Raquel D.'s and Travis's house where I've never been before. Brian Q. invited me and I was like sure, why the hell not, ha ha-- don't really know any of these people but hey, felt like getting kind of drunk. It wasn't a bad time. I think I was friendly, but being off my medication for a few days and drinking was a weird combination.

I did see the doctor yesterday and I'm happy to be back on my medication again. I feel like my mind has been going through the shock of it being back in my system so I've been sleeping a lot the past couple days. I don't feel stressed out or bad about anything which is a good feeling.

I honestly feel like I could give a f**k about a lot of things right now. I feel like I'm finally over Jack... This last girl just really broke the camel's back for me. The fact that we were close for a couple days and then BAM, he's got this new girl and he's posting pictures with her continually.... It's just immature and I'm done with it. I feel like all of this emotion has just been complete waste over the years because he doesn't actually care about me at all. It's all just about what he wants in that current moment.

So the only reason Jack came into my life after all was really just to motivate me to play guitar. I feel like I can now accept this and move on. I've said this time and time again but this time I'm serious. I don't want him back around in my life because my trust is entirely gone and I don't think I could ever take anything he says seriously again so there's no point.

okay moving on....

After this I'm going to watch Bob's burgers and practice guitar.

Some of the things they say in this show are like "Oh my God I can't believe they just said that..." like it does kind of push your comfort level even for a cartoon-- Not as grotesque as Drawn Together, but some of the dialogue is like woah, awkward. Still, I've totally enjoyed this show the past few days and it's kept me entertained while I've been not working. This week has been my vacation of doing nothing really, it's been nice. I feel like when I do start working I'll be really refreshed and ready to go. 

Me right now. Not a very glamorous day as you can see. This is after a three hour nap. Ha ha my bedroom is so gloomy.


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