"S.O.S Day 2" From gasping for air to getting my composure

So as you guys know I came to the conclusion I have to work harder to turn my grades by the end of the quarter (the next four weeks or so)..

 I had another bump in the road last night when I spent hours trying to do well on a quiz and again got a terrible score... 47%. Which I partially blamed on Jacob because we shared answers with eachother and the ones we got different answers on I switched to his answers... and ended up getting a bunch of those wrong and my original answers were right. Because Jacob and I take turns submitting it first so nobody has an advantage, he was right to get frustrated when I flipped out on him for my bad score. I guess I more or less learned my lesson to not completely abandon my own judgement and go with my own gut feelings on answers. I shouldn't just abandon my own work for Jacob's answer because regardless of that fact that he's getting way better grades than me overall, a lot of his answers are decided by intuition and guessing instead of bothering to work through the whole process like I tend to do (which unfortunately tends to take a huge amount of time). Both of our methods work independently but learning to work together is something we could really improve on.

There's going to be another economics midterm in a couple days. I feel like my grasp on this chapter is -slightly- better than the first set but better safe than sorry. Today I spent about 3 hours just working my own copies of the excel templates. Jacob's templates made an extremely convenient reference for using those formulas. Because I've got such a good reference I'm deciding to ensure I'm getting the hang of excel by making my own copies of the templates instead of downloading Gray's. It's a long process but a rewarding one.

Today I was also good and read the first half of my insurance chapter for law. I found this one particularly interesting because it gave me a potential job insight. Insurance agents assess their clients rates by looking at the individual's risk that they will require compensation in the near future. Economics is all about risk evaluation. I am going to make sure to apply for a lot of insurance companies when I begin my career search. Wrote that one on the door.

Do you guys remember frosted toast? Did I mention that while working at Little Caesers? Our awesome roommate Charlie (who happens to be hispanic) brought home these freaking delicious marshmallow cookie treats that his mom sent him with. He'd done some grocery shopping recently and got some really delicious food... Like he went to a legit carneceria in Yakima and got some of the best ham I have ever eaten in my life. Even better than the smoked ham I've had on Christmas time because the moisture in this particular piece was suburb. One I suppose "nice" thing that's come out of the burglary is that Charlie has been over more frequently to keep tabs on his stuff. Understandable. Hopefully he's not keeping super close tabs on his food because I might've also had some of his Mexican brand Saltines.(**Since then I've been grocery shopping, damn munchies!)

I still haven't figured out a way to conveniently post a picture from my phone onto a blog entry I'm writing. I'm sure there is a way, I just haven't really tried.

Jacob and I laid next to eachother and had a really long conversation about better ways to respond to situations one of us feels defensive or uncomfortable about instead of blaming the other person. Granted Jacob does not blame me for things, sometimes even when it's partially my fault.. so I should do the same in return.

I cried today about not having my guitars. Not being able to practice has really been eating away at me. This super sweet, awesome guy named Tucker actually said he'd give me one of his guitars that has been since collecting dust and if he were to do that I would be grateful for the rest of my life. Losing my guitars has been like the kidnapping of two of my best friends. I might not ever see them again or bring them back but I can at least make new friends.

peace.

We were robbed.

Afternoon everyone.

Well I've finally got a computer again. The last 3 weeks I've been using Jacob's computer which didn't allow me much free time with it. Who's Jacob? My new boyfriend who I'm now living with and have been for the past three weeks. Crazy? Yes. Regret it? No, it's been an awesome three weeks for the most part. Aside from the major setback that happened last night.

I guess it took something traumatic to happen to get me blogging again. The last entry I wrote was in the middle of a complete sh*t storm caused by meeting some blue collar dude at a party and making his ex girlfriend blow a f*cking cork because I was hitting on him. In hindsight I'm glad I didn't get a chance to meet him again because I might have fallen for someone who totally wasn't the right one for me in the first place.

Jacob and I met in micro class. He was sitting in the front corner during Gray's difficult lectures and I was sitting towards the back with my mouth shut at this point. I couldn't follow the math and the homework was getting harder and harder. It was at this point I came to Jacob and asked for help. We met later that day at the library, then went and got coffee, then kept hanging out from there. This weekend is the first time we are going to be apart since we met eachother, which is also crazy.

I'll tell you guys more about Jacob later. I want to get to the story of devastating news that has me so paralyzed by shock/disgust even to this minute. I know I need to clean the apartment and get work done but it's too easy to sit at the computer and keep an eye on Craigslist listings and network with people who might know something.

Here's a picture of Jacob. He took me out on a really nice date last night, we went to dinner and then saw Fiddler on the Roof which was really good because it was about Jewish people getting kicked out of Ukraine like our past relatives did. Jake is half Jewish and really spiritual. He's helped me get in touch with my own spirituality again and has been teaching me about the kabala. He's a total genius, too.. I'm so in love. ANYWAY.

The robbery story:

Last night when we got home the door to our apartment was WIDE open. There was garbage on the floor and drawers pulled out. Jacob's TV stand was pulled out from the wall and the TV was missing, along with his two xboxes, his sound card, all of his x box games, and laptop with all of his schoolwork from the past 5 months. He threw his shirt off in anger and stormed around in a rage.

Shortly after I noticed the prick took not just one but BOTH my guitars and my amplifier. Luckily they didn't take my big bulky old computer. I'm thankful I even have a computer. I lost my composure and started almost wailing when I saw my guitars were gone. But something stopped me from crying and the second Jacob told me to be quiet because he feels like breaking down. Because I realized that even if what I lost was sentimental to me, Jacob and Charlie lost so much more.

Charlie is Jacob's roommate. His room got hit the hardest.

 

His entire shoe collection was stolen, along with his emergency savings hidden in his sock drawer. 

The black is from the cops dusting for finger prints. Whoever did this was wearing gloves. These are career criminals that knew what they were doing and it's more than likely our stuff is getting pawned off and sold for drug money as I write this. But I can't dwell on the past. I have to be strong and create a better future for my boyfriend and I. I am going to do everything I can to find a part time job starting tomorrow. Today I'm going to get the apartment totally clean.

peace.